Last Friday I was feeling stressed out and overwhelmed by my work responsibilities. As I told my friends I was feeling like I’d been getting really good at getting things done quickly and efficiently, but was only doing so in order to cram my schedule full of more things. I felt like I needed to work more from my heart than my head. I made the spontaneous decision to go on a retreat the next day at Temenos, a spiritual retreat center in Shutesbury, MA (and the location of the Monk’s Cave mentioned earlier here).
When I called the caretaker in the morning she told me the dirt road leading to the base of Mt. Mineral might be impassable, although I could hike from a longer distance if I wanted to. I packed my things (lightly) and started out. While I was on my way she called me back and let me know I could drive to the main parking area, if I was careful.
I parked and loaded my belongings onto a sled, then began the familiar hike. I stopped briefly when I reached the interesting rock carving of the Bodhisattva, Jizo, protector of women and children (photo in earlier post). A story is told that Jizo was so moved by compassion that she made it her mission to redeem all of the souls in hell.
After speaking to the caretaker and leaving some belongings in my cabin (I was fortunate to get the most remote one, built by Temenos’ founders), I began hiking along a remote trail I’d heard about on a previous visit. This path took me through beautiful natural terrain, alternating between rocky, hilly areas and swampland. There were many stone shrines along the trail and at at least one spot I picked up a strong impression of Native American ritual energy. The trail looped around in a circle and at one point I hiked up a beautiful rock formation with a waterfall.
After that I headed for my old favorite, the stone chamber called the Monk’s Cave. I tried to motivate myself to stay there for a couple of hours. I began to pray and meditate, and then to move my body rhymically and make sounds to release tension as I sat on the stone seat at the back. I felt some discomfort but it was the kind associated with doing good, necessary work. I started to feel tired and drifted in and out of a light dream state. As I was thinking about the drama in my life the words “I’m not in the story” came as a quick lapse into dream. After I’d been there about 45 minutes I left-it seems like the energy there is still too strong for me to remain inside for long periods (Interestingly the next day I spoke to an acquiantance who it turned out knew of the cave and has meditated there many times. He considers it a magical place and the center of special magnetic activity, something I’ve also felt).
I headed back to my cabin, which had no electrical power. I started to build my fire. I had no cooking to do since I was doing a fruit and water fast that day. I let out a couple of loud screams to release some of the bottled-up tension I’d been feeling (my cabin was so far away from everything else that I’m sure no one heard me).
I’ll post the rest of this story soon…